In Absence
by ryudaishiki
Summary: This is only the first chapter of what I hope will be many in developing certain characters and their relationships in DBZ recently after the Buu Saga. If you are adverse to male/male, male/hermaphrodite relations, please do not bother. I hope to delve a lot deeper into how each character is thinking, feeling and reacting as many events both happy and disturbing occur throughout.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Dragon Ball/Z/GT characters and materials for this entire fan fiction belong to Toriyama Sensei and respective owners; the rest is mine. Expect mature themes throughout.**

A/N: Do not worry. My other story is still rolling; I just couldn't let this plot bunny go. I will finish both in time, but I won't rush. I prefer my work to be quality and that takes time. Plus I do have other engagements and responsibilities as life always make sure I am supplied with plenty of. Thank you for reading and enjoy.

**In Absence**

Prologue

To accurately convey how _we_ came to be will take more than a bit of effort. It did not just happen, and like dutifully training the body, mind and spirit, sometimes took a lot more than mere will and diligence. The day I first saw his tears, I knew that I never wanted to witness such a painfully forlorn expression on him ever again. _  
><em>

Before that, the morning of funeral, the sky was heavily imbued with the darkened storm clouds he'd amassed with his power like a god in his own right; the sky weeping the tears he refused to show in front of his peers. But I know for certain he had wanted to cry; for no man no matter how powerful or gifted is an island, on Earth or any other world. I did not know it that day, but I would soon learn that there was so much more to him than the others would have ever believed.

The still small boy his spitting image wept heartily in his arms that morning, and for once he did not chastise him for committing such an act. His elder teen son stood tall; his face as hard and pressed as his father's as they all waited on the sodden earth above and to the side of her casket. I have had a fatherly affection towards the young man for what seems so long and so short at the same time, so the harsh penetration of his dark eyes as he stole a look towards me did catch my breath. So much had always been put on his plate so early. It was unfair was a heavy understatement. Before his eyes left mine, I knew that he understood that too, all the more. I also knew; as much as I yearned to, that there was nothing I could say or do to truly alleviate his burden.

Tension saturated the entire group. Just as I, his friends and fellow senshi had yearned to say something, anything that might mitigate the sober moment for the Sons. But alas, words proved horribly inadequate to even soften the severity of such despair. It had only been less than a year since his return to Earth. And since Chi-Chi had died of a natural brain aneurism, there was nothing Dende, Shen Long nor even Porunga could do. The Sons' only solace was that it had happened in her sleep, so as far as they knew, she hadn't died in pain. Another heavy blow came from the Kaios. They no longer allowed _him_ to travel back and forth between Other World; urging that while he was alive again he needed to remain within the limits of the living. So great was his pain...so fragile are those with a heart.

A somber but heartfelt farewell was given from all attending after Chi-Chi had been completely interred in the rich earth her flesh had originally come from. I am certain the broken sigh of sorrow from him was heard by no other, but my ears tend to pick up quite a lot of what goes on in the universe; even at times, much to my dismay.

I was a bit hurt when all three Sons turned down my offer of company that day, but I understood. The whole group left then; each departing for their own homes. Little did any of us realize just how much the loss of the overbearing but loving woman would have on us all...

* * *

><p><em>Chapter 1<em>

_Mourning Morning_

"Tousan? Is it alright if I stay the weekend at Kami's Lookout?" inquired the anxious teen.

He had been doing his best to fill his mother's role—cooking, cleaning, taking care of the house, his father and younger brother, all while still attending school—but he was pretty much at his limit. Losing her weighed just as heavily on him as it did them, yet he had done his best to be the rock for them all. After more than a month of it though, he needed a real break; if only for a little while. And since Goten was spending the weekend at Capsule Corp for Trunks' sleepover, he thought that it would be the right time. Not only that, he missed and finally felt ready to tell Dende how he really felt about him. While Videl proved a wonderful friend and comrade, Dende already had his heart early on; his image cascading the landscapes of his mind for what seemed an eternity. He had just been too afraid—of the what the others would say, of what his mother might think. But since she had passed, he knew he could no longer keep himself contained. He deserved to be happy, and the universe willing, he would make Dende happy too. Regardless of his answer, he refused to keep feeling so bottled up. Somehow, he knew he had to have some real release soon. So although he did not want to leave his father alone so soon, he felt they both needed it.

"Tousan?" "Gohan? Oh, sure...as long as it's alright with Dende and Mister Popo," Goku tried to joke, knowing they would never turn him away. With a face more serious, Goku turned to gaze at him directly. "Just please don't be giving me any grandchildren any time soon. You're still young Gohan, and I am so sorry I always seem to put such heavy burdens on you... I-I only want the best for you. Please never forget that," said Goku sincerely.

Gohan peered at him almost incredulously; his eye beginning to brim with tears. His father was a lot less oblivious than he thought.

"Neither of us is ready for that, Tousan, so don't worry there. But I don't even know that he'll say..." "You have nothing to worry about on that end Gohan; he feels the same. I just want you to be safe until you're both ready, okay? I just want you to experience all the joy and wonder you deserve in life at your own pace for once, my Son." "Alright, Tousan," answered Gohan, the dam finally breaking. They shared a long embrace; both allowing a few tears to dampen each others' clothing before pulling away.

As Goku watched his eldest take off towards the Lookout, he truly felt he understood at least some of the stress and heartache he had caused Chi-Chi every time they left her to wait for them at home...possibly never to return. Sighing heavily, he turned to go back inside. He had lost some weight since her absence; even food seeming to lose its flavor.

* * *

><p>Don't ask me why, but I followed him for hours one night after both his sons had left. I watched with precision each lengthened move as he peered out soberly at the vast sea he had finally chosen to settle for. As grand as it was, I am sure it couldn't possibly represent even a portion of the pain I knew ebbed throughout his being. While instinctively I'm sure he knew he would probably outlive her, no way would he have ever believed it would come so soon.<p>

After what seemed eons of gazing into the dark water of night—tears, saturated with the depth of his pain, his lament finally began to fall. All that he refused to show in public finally broke out. And as I gazed upon his face from afar, I felt cold inside. I did not recognize it. For never should _he _appear so forlorn.

I kept watching as he stood listless in the dark. I thought my ears might burst at the sudden agonizing keen that erupted from him then; falling to my knees at the extensive agony.

My breath caught as the painful noise suddenly halted. In my weakness, I had given away my position. I could see him peering around anxiously until his arduous eyes seemed to fall right upon me. He beckoned me strongly then without words, and I heeded, levitating over to him swiftly.

As I stood in front of him, he studied my eyes intensely; fervently striving to bore into my encloistered soul. I was too off guard from his foreign demeanor to stave off his sudden movement as he wrapped his burly arms around my taller body and locked his lips against my own. Never having experienced it before, I found myself closing my eyes as he deepened the kiss; his tongue beginning to earnestly mingle with my own. What had seemed a grotesque mystery of mating creatures to me at one time began to make sense. It was so queerly sublime; I would have never believed it without having experienced it.

I finally opened my eyes as he pulled away for breath. As I looked around, I knew we were no longer on Earth. He had taken us to one of his hidden treasures; a planet reminiscent of Earth but without the negativity and pollution of _so-called intelligent_ beings. No, the planet was healthy and full of life, but it was all still innocent in its infancy. I could easily sense why he liked it there.

I almost shivered as he gingerly clasped my hand with his own; urging me on to what proved to be an elegant cavern in the side of a regal mountain. Although I knew I should have stopped him there as his intentions were clear, I could not bear the thought of destroying his moment of possible relief. However slight, there was a sliver of hope in him again. What right did I have to take it away?

He was unmistakably gentle as he pulled away my garments; his own already relinquished in a corner of the cave. Before he lie me down upon the plush layers of animal skins I could tell he had accumulated over time, he peered into my eyes once more; passionately asking my permission without words. He bit his lip and clenched his palms as he awaited my answer. Leave it to Son to do things in the wrong order, but at least he had asked first.

I felt his immediate relief as I pulled him to me; it being me that time to initiate the kiss. He kept kissing me so deeply—drinking me in so heartily that I thought I might never breath again. And as he pulled away to peer down at me, I had to look away a moment. No one had ever gazed upon me with such utter and profound desire, such _yearning_. It was then I realized that I too desired him; expressing it with another kiss the best I could. Though the Kami in me had witnessed the act many times while watching over the earth, it was all still so new to me.

For the first time I felt a need I had never known. I knew what went where and why for the act, but wasn't quite sure if... Words could not convey the conflicting sensations which permeated my being when he suddenly breached my most intimate portions of flesh. He had easily maneuvered past my body's protective armor and made our bodies become one before I was ready. Worry painted his face at my tears, but I urged him on, lying that the pain wasn't any worse than something that could occur in battle. He gazed at me in pain for my pain but in even deeper need. He knew I was lying and didn't want for my suffering, but neither did he wish to stop.

I took a deep breath then and rotated my hips at our connection; striving my best to give him a smirk, a challenge if you will. It worked. I cannot tell you how long he moved his body against my own. I only know as the pain eventually evolved into pleasure; finding myself meeting him stroke for stroke. The more we moved, the closer I felt I needed to be to him. And as sensations heightened, I knew I did not want it to end any more than he did, but that an end had to come.

I heard him lightly chuckle as I grasped onto him tighter, moving more frantically. _I needed_... It was one thing he was more experienced in than I; something I'm sure he fancied. And as we reached our zeniths together, the cavern seemed to erupt in rainbows of cascading power; as waves of energy pervaded and escaped from the both of us. I could tell how much freer he felt at not having to hold back and couldn't help but smile at that.

We both fell upon the animal skins in a heap. I had never felt so _free_. And as I looked over to see his face, I couldn't help but mirror his finally returning smile. His face appeared too foreign without it. As he pulled me closer to his person, I felt warm; so very warm that I thought I might burst. He didn't just use me as I thought he would to ease or run from his suffering the way I had seen and heard many earthlings do so on many occasion—I was _precious_ to him. I was not a mere replacement or momentary fancy; I was... The realization made tears build in my eyes once more. For just how long had he felt that way?

He kissed me deeply then; wiping the tears from my eyes before pulling away to gaze into them.

"I love you Piccolo," he whispered sincerely before lying his head on my chest. I hadn't words for him, but that was okay. He knew how I truly felt far more than words ever could convey. And even as he reached slumber far before I, I found myself mourning the come of morning. For just how different would things truly become between us?

* * *

><p>Dende was still blushing violet to his elegantly pointed ears. He had left Gohan in the care of Mister Popo for a while to "attend Guardian business" after Gohan's earnest and fervent confession. He hadn't meant to deceive him. It had just been so unexpected. It touched his heart that Gohan found him so very precious. He would never forget every heartfelt word. But...he wasn't ready, was he? Gohan had been clear that he hoped to share not only his heart and mind with him but his body. He just didn't... A knock at his door interrupted his train of thought.<p>

Gohan remained on the other side of his door while he spoke. "I'm sorry Dende. It was selfish of me to put so much on you at once. I just needed you to know how I feel... I'm going to go home now, so don't worry. I won't bother you anymore. Please forgive me," Gohan's voice faltered.

"Gohan! Please wait!" Dende threw the door open and quickly grasped onto Gohan. Feeling such pain in Gohan's spirit crushed his own. Guiding Gohan into his personal room, Dende sat them down on his bed. He needed to get it together for both of them and fast. He was Guardian of the Earth for crying out loud!

"Gohan, I know that you have been going through a lot since-," "No. _Please Dende_, do not talk to me the way they do. I've pored my heart out to you. If you feel the same, tell me. If you don't, still tell me. But don't try and placate me as if I were an ignorant piece of glass."

Dende was astonished, but managed to calm himself enough to continue. "I have been quite fond of you since we met on my home world years ago. The more I get to know you, the closer I feel to you... I am sorry for my earlier actions. You really caught me off guard. I never thought you would have ever felt such a way for _me_... It's not unrequited; I can assure you," he finally finished, blushing violet to his ears once more. "Really?" whispered Gohan, in real need of reassurance. "Really," answered Dende with a smile.

He wasn't quite ready for the powerful embrace and deluge of tears that followed as Gohan began to let out much of what he had held within him. He was even more surprised as Gohan pulled him closer and locked his lips with his own, but he managed not to pull away. He could feel the turmoil within Gohan and longed to ease him any way he could.

Dende surely wasn't ready for more than kissing, but he knew he could give Gohan at least that much. Pulling away for breath, they both gazed into each other deeply before smiling and embracing one another. Sharing things with each other throughout the night telepathically brought them closer to one another than ever before. And as they lay in the same bed to sleep, there was a comfort and peace just in having the other around.

**TBC...**


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Thank you so much for your elaborate and honest review, following and favoriting **Kami2015**. I hope for more in the future. There are reasons why things are developing as they are. As many things that might seem evident at any moment, there will be much more to it as the story proceeds. So, there may be scenes that seem rushed or 'jarring', but it is all for purpose and to provoke and elucidate certain thoughts and feelings as the story progresses. I don't want to give anything away, but just keep in mind that I labeled this story Drama/Supernatural for a few reasons; which will all be more elaborated upon in time. I had originally leaned toward Tragedy/Supernatural, but this story is not as simple and predictable as that. I hate labels anyway, because a great story isn't going be one you can put in a box (kind of like people). I hope not to disappoint, but at the same time I must tell the story the best way I can. I do, however, still appreciate and respect genuine writing tips and honest reviews; as I do hope to improve my writing as this journey continues. Please know that I do take everything into consideration. Thanks again **Kami2015** and all who have taken an interest. Enjoy!

Chapter 2

_Consequences of Confession_

Gohan sighed heavily to himself as he flew towards his destination. It was time. He and Videl had agreed to take a break after his mother's death. She knew what it was like to lose a mother early and understood that he would need some time. What she hadn't known was that Gohan had been in love with another for far longer than he had known her. He did and would always love her as a cherished friend and comrade; still in awe of the love and friendship she had so generously shared with him, never to be forgotten. She was the one friend that he had gained on his own; not from his father or through the Z senshi. He could only hope she would bounce back alright. Pain was the last thing he wanted to cause her or anyone that was part of his heart.

Videl was such a kind, just and powerful woman. Indeed, it was that she reminded him so much of his mother that he had first been drawn to her. But for the same reason, he knew he must be true to himself. His heart, his life belonged to another. It would be wrong to string either of them along on pretenses. The pale, cold, lifeless body of his mother was solidly seared into his mind. The image made everything painfully lucid; sobering him immensely as a person. Deception was never a good thing. Never again would he deny his true self—what he truly yearned for and otherwise—thus Saiyaman would also have to be put to rest. Lies to fit in, childish fantasies and lost time would no longer be part of his world. He would be true to himself and all those he cared for from then on. He could only hope that she would understand; for he did desire to remain good friends. Either way, he would always be grateful for knowing her.

Videl fixed her hair lightly. She had allowed it to grow a bit. It was still short but just long enough for curled ends to gently flow as they were kissed by the wind. She was enthused that Gohan had finally called. She had kept her distance so as not to pressure him during such painful times. She greatly hoped that he would allow her to comfort him; that he wouldn't push her away and deny his emotions like too many people when they're hurting. Healing can be very painful, but she hoped he would allow her to help him begin the process. She also missed him greatly. Though not so much time had passed, it seemed liked ages since they had last spoken.

Taking a breath, Videl gazed at herself in the mirror. Gohan hadn't specified where they were going, so she decided to dress casually in some fitting blue jeans, a long-sleeved white t-shirt and some white tennis shoes. She knew Gohan would have told her if they were going someplace nice; though any place was magical with him around. He was...

Her thoughts calmed some as Gohan floated outside her bedroom window. His expression made her own falter. Something was wrong. She felt her heart clench even before his words. Opening her window, she let him in and sat down on her bed before he could say a word.

Gohan took a deep breath before beginning. "Videl, you know I love and appreciate you more than words could possibly convey..." Tears had already formed in Videl's eyes, but she continued to listen intently. "...I haven't been entirely honest with you. I am so sorry for that; for it hasn't been fair to either of us..." Pausing to wipe her fallen tears and bring her closer to him; Gohan strove to stifle his own. He had to do it. "...I am grateful for all the love and time you have shared with me, but the fact is I have been in love with another for even longer than I have known you. The loss of my mother has forced me to realize that I must be honest with myself and those I hold dear. I cannot wear another face just to suit minds that do not understand..." "W-who is she," faltered Videl's voice, hurt laced throughout it. "It's he actually." Realization and a tiny sliver of relief seemed to dawn in Videl's face. The pain of losing him hadn't left it, but his confession seemed to soften the blow.

"It's that big green guy, isn't it? You two have always seemed quite close. I can't compete with that," she chuckled halfheartedly. "Piccolo? No. He is my dear shishou and friend, and has been more like a father to me than anything..." Though he thought it, he didn't add 'even more so than my actual father.' "... He is green though. You saw him that day we all died when we were all brought back and on Kami's Lookout." "The smaller guy?" "Yes, _my Dende_. I'm sure I've already told you he is Earth's Kami. But I've known him since long before that; when we were both small children... I regret distancing myself from him for fear of what others would think. But he knows and understands, and we hope to grow closer despite lost time."

Videl pulled away from him and peered deeply into Gohan's mystical black orbs. "W-was it all a lie?" her voiced quivered. "No, absolutely not. I have loved you and always will. I am grateful for all you have shared and taught me. You are one of my dearest friends and comrades. I sincerely hope that won't end. But my heart and life belong to him; that I can no longer deny," Gohan earnestly declared, holding her chin gently with his index finger and thumb the way he had done sometimes, tears finally spilling from his own eyes at the immense hurt he felt from her in waves.

"Well, that's that," said Videl, pulling out of his embrace. "Videl?" Gohan whispered, his voice painted with fear of losing her entirely. She took a few deep breaths before turning to him again. "Please understand, I thought you were the one, _my special one..._ Gohan. It will take some time, but I would like for us to remain friends as well," she confessed softly, trying to smile while tears still spilled freely from her eyes. Gohan tried to hug her, but her arms halted him. "I need some time, Gohan—_alone_," she declared more strongly. He nodded somberly; standing up and stepping towards the window.

"Wait!" cried Videl suddenly just before his foot stepped outside the sill. As he turned to look at her, she swiftly stole his lips with her own one last time; both their tears painting the flavor of their last kiss. Finally pulling away from one another, they gazed at each other one last time before letting go.

Videl watched intently as Gohan flew away. He had given her many great memories, shown her new worlds and even taught her to fly. No matter how much it hurt, she knew she could never really hate him. Pulling out her Great Saiyaman II watch and putting it on; she whimpered lightly. She knew they would never go out as even that pair again. It would just hurt too much. And from Gohan's words and demeanor, she was certain he was ready to put away childish things. If she fought crime again, it would be only as Videl.

Curling up on her bed, Videl grasped and squeezed both her eyes and pillow tightly. Why did all the great ones have to be gay or taken?! Somehow she would be alright again; _they_ would be alright again, eventually. Tears continued to spill for a while more before she got up to wash her face and change. There were many hours in the gym with her name on them.

* * *

><p>Gohan streamed through, in, out and around the clouds for a while before deciding to return home; striving to relinquish the rest of his own tears. He had not meant to hurt her so, <em>never<em>. Why did certain things always have to be so hard?

Upon finally returning home, he was more than surprised by what filled his vision once entering the Son Home. His father was sitting quietly in the living room like a small child that had been chastised, and in the kitchen was..._really_? Piccolo was cursing quietly to himself while trying to make proper use of the kitchen utensils as he attempted to cook. A smile did rise to Gohan's face then; any levity much needed at that point.

"Good afternoon," Gohan finally said, addressing both adults. "Hi Son," answered Goku a bit subdued. "How did it go, Gohan?" inquired Piccolo thoughtfully in his usual tone of voice, although his ears had already received the answer. "About as well as could be... I am just glad there are no more secrets," said Gohan. He noticed both his father's and Piccolo's slight stiffening at the finishing of his sentence but didn't think much of it.

"So Piccolo-san, how did Tousan get you in the kitchen. Did _you_ lose a bet?" Gohan joked, trying to lighten the atmosphere. He sobered up quickly though; not at all liking the heavy silence that followed. It was then that he noticed a certain scent in the air that hadn't been there before; the strong scent of his father and _Piccolo_... His face began to twitch then. It hadn't even been a year since Kaasan... Of all people... His only solace at that moment was that Goten was over at Capsule Corp; a fierce rage beginning to boil within and take over him.

"Gohan, we were going to tell you..today actually. Goten is still too young to understand... But, I hoped you would," Goku began nervously. Piccolo stopped his ministrations and moved over to them; easily sensing the severe change in the room as it became thick with charged particles. "Take us somewhere life besides our own won't be harmed. _Now_," commanded Gohan fiercely, unable to focus enough to do it himself. Goku quickly obliged with an advanced version of shunkan idou. He understood well how difficult it was to control their immense power when anger stepped into the fray.

His own focus wasn't great at that moment, but Goku managed to take them to a planet barely populated with just enough plant life for them to have breathable air. He knew it hadn't been the greatest way for Gohan to find out, but it was going to happen eventually regardless. And he wasn't going to deny himself just because Chi-Chi was gone. It didn't mean he loved her any less. If anything he loved her and his sons enough to keep on living; for a huge part of him had yearned to return to Other World at her passing. Losing her had been a severe blow to all of them. But he had needs like anyone, and had been drawn to Piccolo for much longer than he wanted to admit. He had kept his promise of marriage to her and would always love her. But Piccolo owned his heart as his true mate, and their union did help ease the pain of losing her; especially so soon after his return to Earth. Couldn't his son understand?

Goku's thoughts were interrupted by the fiercest blow to the face; knocking and forcing him meters into the planet upon which they had stood and crushing his cheek bone. Well, if a real fight was what his son needed, he would oblige. Roaring wildly and powering up to Super Saiyajin 3, Goku moved to take an offensive battle stance. But Gohan did not wait for him to be ready. Blow after vicious blow, he delivered a speedy and relentless barrage of crushing hits upon his father's flesh; blood soon oozing from Goku's nose and mouth before he could catch his breath.

Gohan continued his violent punishment; sparks clicking the air particles as his sentou ryoku erratically rose exponentially, his hair lengthening and becoming more rigid down his back but without change in hue as he continued his pernicious assault. Goku coughed and strove to put up enough of a defense to even be able to speak. He knew it was never a good thing to lose control, and at that moment he did fear that Gohan might do more than merely bust up his body.

A chilling scream erupted from Goku as Gohan's fierce blows did succeed in breaking not only his defense and flow of thought but both his arms as he had attempted to protect himself.

"GOHAN! STOP THIS NOW!" Goku finally yelled at the top of his lungs. He had no other choice; as Gohan was easily overpowering him at his most powerful.

It took a moment, but Gohan eventually returned to rationality; gasping in horror at the bloody wheezing pile that was supposed to be his father.

"Otousan! Please hang on!" cried Gohan, cradling his father's body in his arms.

An intense and furious anger had pervaded his entire being at finding out about his father and Piccolo—paired with his increasing saiyajin urges and the events and immense emotions that had piled up—but never had he really wanted to hurt him. Not like that, _never._

Finally becoming calm enough to focus, Gohan teleported directly to Kami's Lookout. Dende immediately ran to and began healing Goku's broken form; the pained and manic expression that painted Gohan's face causing his own to falter. Though he felt strongly to ask, Dende decided to remain silent for the time. One ought not to force things; especially when someone is hurting or not in their right mind.

After Dende's mystical healing touch was finished, Goku came to. His eyes curtly shifted toward his son; hurt, fear and disbelief saturating them. Never before had one close to his heart ever genuinely wanted to _destroy_ him, to make him _suffer_. And as he peered just a bit longer at his son before looking away, he realized that he did not truly know him. Through touch, Goku had heard and felt some of the chaotic and irate thoughts and feelings that ran through Gohan's head as he had pummeled him bloody. He still could not believe...

"Gohan... I know I haven't been the best parent, but I have always done my best. I don't always have the right answers, and sometimes I do make crappy decisions... But I have always loved you Son. Why... Why is there so much hate inside of you for me?" Goku all but whimpered, it taking everything just to keep his tears at bay.

Gohan didn't have a straight answer. There was much he was still trying to understand himself, and paired with his growing saiyajin hormones, instincts and propensities, losing his mother and ending up hurting someone as decent as Videl; he had just lost himself, his father's and Piccolo's union being the last straw. Even at that moment, it was taking all he had to remain conscious and aware; the beast within always lying just below the surface. He surely needed some time away from all which provoked his baser sides; some time to clarify, purify and balance himself. They did need to talk, but it would have to come another day.

"Can we talk another time, Tousan?" "Yeah, Gohan... I guess that means that you'll be staying away for while?" "I'll be up here if anyone _really_ needs me; though I cannot tell you for how long," answered Gohan somberly. "Alright Son... I-I guess I'll see you when I see ya," whispered Goku, pain still lacing his voice.

Turning to Dende, Goku thanked him and then curtly exited Kami's Lookout in a blast of ki.

Dende immediately turned his attention to Gohan. Gohan was just standing there; his eyes staring downward but not really seeing. Dende yearned immensely at that moment to be able to heal him like he could their bodies, but the mind was an entirely different arena. Genuine and holistic healing would take time, effort and the cooperation of the person in need of it. And just like the flesh, some things never completely healed; scars being the remaining weak points in a psyche as well. He could only hope that Gohan would accept his help and learn to accept all of himself.

Gingerly looping Gohan's hand with his own, Dende began leading him deeper into the temple. After a slight trek they finally made it to the special room Dende had in mind. It could be considered pretty much the opposite of the Room of Spirit and Time—dark, cool, calm, tranquil, predictable and unaffected by and without time. It was the perfect room for quiet reflection and meditation. Time would have still passed outside of the room, but no particles or cells would have to age once inside. And resolutions could still be reached safely in the different dimension. He had never known a more serene place. The only real danger of the room was that one might become too accustomed to, immersed in and even drunk off of it; ultimately losing themselves entirely, never returning to the real world. He remembered that Mister Popo had warned him to be careful there; in the room known as 'Timeless.' He wasn't worried though. He had already used it on multiple occasion to strengthen and clarify his own mind, and was certain that he and Gohan would be alright in there _together_. But more importantly, he wished with his whole being to be able to help _his beloved._

Gohan finally focused and looked around once he heard the giant black double doors shut behind them. "Dende?" "This is the room called Timeless. It is designed to ease the spirit and strengthen the mind, but that always depends more upon the user. For some, this room can be quite foreboding; especially if one is afraid of or detesting of their true and natural self. I don't think we'll have a problem though. I-," "Dende... I don't know if I am ready for something like this... I-," "You haven't fully learned to control your baser saiyajin instincts and propensities, nor have you learned to accurately separate them from your true thought and feelings. The more they clash, the greater will be your turmoil; inner and out. I want to help you Gohan; as your Kami, friend and mate. I love you so very much. I don't ever want to see you with such a sad and forlorn presence," confessed Dende sincerely.

Gohan peered at him so strongly then, Dende shivered under his gaze. "Why do you love me? I am so... _broken_. And look how long it took us to... I've been a coward posing as a hero," said Gohan, his head falling between his shoulders.

"You're wrong Gohan. So much was forced on you so early, and you were just expected to endure and continue, yet you became a real hero anyway. Not because of your power but because of the love and kindness you refuse to relinquish no matter how hard times become. I love you because you _are_ wonderful regardless. Since I met you, I couldn't imagine a universe without you. It was you who had the courage to save me, a stranger that day years ago on my home planet. How different could that day have turned out for us all otherwise... Fear of being broken has never stopped you from doing the right thing. It has been your fear of hurting others that has held you back. But you must realize, you are mortal too. What you want and need does matter, and as such, you're not going to be able to please everyone; sometimes not even yourself. But I know you have the strength to go on. You are such a beautiful soul, Gohan," expressed Dende, honestly, passionately, Gohan already having wrapped him in a warm embrace.

"You are too good for me," whispered Gohan, lightly kissing Dende's cheek. Dende only shook his head in the negative before pulling away just enough to tentatively press his lips to Gohan's. He still wasn't used to physical affection, but yearned to express his immense love for Gohan. Gohan immediately responded; his tongue deepening the kiss with urgency. Dende moaned a moment at the blissful intrusion before pulling away.

"I would love to go further Gohan but not yet. I brought you here for-," "I know. Thank you, Dende," said Gohan, sitting down in a meditative pose upon the reflective dark water-like floor. "Would you like me to anchor you?" inquired Dende. "No. Just knowing you're here means more than you know," whispered Gohan.

Dende smiled and took an asana of his own beside but not too close to Gohan as not to distract or disturb him. He had more than enough faith in Gohan, and only hoped he would learn to fully accept and control his entire being. For after watching Earth for such a time as Guardian, he knew genuine inner peace was not an easy thing to find for anyone.

* * *

><p>As Goku returned to his home just after sunset, he did everything he could to lighten his demeanor before going in. Inside he could feel the ki signatures of his second son, his best friend and his new mate. He had to keep it together, somehow.<p>

Piccolo smoothly opened the door before he could reach for the handle. He gazed at Goku a moment; knowing something was clearly wrong but remained silent in front of present company. The exquisite scent of roasted meat, miso, freshly cooked vegetables and tender rice delightfully kissed Goku's olfactory; a real smile returning to his face. There was still a sea of emotion underneath. But as he gazed at his Goten and Trunks and Piccolo in an apron; he had to smile. They had waited for him to eat; getting a bit antsy, but still they had waited for _him_. His eyes did water a bit then.

"Otousan, what's wrong?" asked the still innocent voice of his youngest son. "I'm just happy and hungry," Goku answered. "Well, so are we," chimed in Trunks. "Let me wash up and then we'll get started," said Goku, moving toward the kitchen sink. "Where's Nii-chan? I felt his power grow really big and then I didn't feel it anymore," asked Goten a little worried. While Goku's form did stiffen a bit, he managed to remain calm. "He's gonna be staying with Dende for a while. Don't worry he's fine. He just needs some time away. You'll understand when you're older," Goku finished. Goten grumbled lightly. He was getting sick and tired of hearing that he would understand when he was older. But once Piccolo gave him a disapproving look, he quieted.

Finally sitting down at the dinner table, Goku was the first to say: "Itadakimasu!" The piles of food around the table that Piccolo had actually prepared quite well began to get smaller and smaller as saiyajin appetites continued to devour. Even Piccolo had a little soup and tea; complimenting himself mentally as he drank. So dinner went off without a hitch; everyone getting their fill.

* * *

><p>"Piccolo-san! Come on, get in with us!" cried an excited Goten from the tub. "Yeah, I bet you can't handle us!" urged Trunks after him. Goku just shrugged his shoulders and laughed nervously. The boys were still young and wanted them all to bathe and play together, so the three of them were already in the large outside tub; Piccolo remaining vigilant nearby should trouble break. He could easily feel that a storm was brewing within Goku; that he would need to be on guard for both of them for a while.<p>

"Don't worry boys. It's just not his cup of tea," joked Goku before dunking both youths' heads under water, striving with his all to laugh heartily once more. At least they shouldn't know how bad he felt. Even Piccolo he not want to know the depth of it. Dunking his head under water too, Goku did all in his power keep reins on his tears.

Once Goten and Trunks were dried and dressed, they had asked for the adults to tell them a story before bed. Goku didn't have one in mind, so Piccolo came to the plate.

"Once upon a time on night just like this, two little boys found themselves in world of trouble as they were being chased by a giant vicious monstrosity. They had disobeyed their parents; staying out too late and..." "_Boring. _Stories like that are told to make bad little children obey. We are good kids already. Tell us a _real scary_ story," quipped Trunks._  
><em>

Piccolo growled to himself internally. So, the little ingrates wanted something 'scary' huh? He had just the story in mind; something they wouldn't soon forget. Using his psychokinesis to eerily turn out all the lights in the house at once, hovering in the middle of the room cross-legged and alighting just his face with a continuous and controlled stream of ki; Piccolo began telling an ancient Earth tale. Goku, Goten and Trunks sat down around him quickly; intently hanging on every word.

Twenty minutes later, three Super Saiyajins came rushing out of the house; screaming and running around in circles. Piccolo sweatdropped and sighed before going outside to retrieve them.

Moving swiftly and placing a hand onto Goku's shoulder, Piccolo tried to get his attention. He growled when Goku screamed louder and shot him with a ki-blast.

_Son! Get ahold of yourself! You can feel by my ki that it's me. Also, that story was meant to scare the kids, not you. It was what they asked for._

_Oh! It is you. Whew! That was too scary Pic. I don't think I've ever even been that afraid even in battle. Don't do that again._

Piccolo gazed at Goku with a half smile. He supposed that naive nature was part of why the Kami in him had always loved him. He was so vast, lucid and adept and yet still painfully simple. Without thinking, he took him into his arms and locked lips with him. He stopped immediately once he heard the simultaneous gasps of two chibis; the mantra of 'uh-oh' beginning to run through his mind.

_Don't worry Pic. They were going to find out soon anyway. I'll handle this._

"Otousan, why are you and Piccolo-san kissing?" asked Goten curiously. "You know how close your mother and I were? Well, now Piccolo and I are just as close. Make no mistake, no one can ever replace your mother. But... I'm still living, Goten...and I..." "It's okay. I want you to be happy Otousan. I don't want you to be sad like Okaasan was when you were gone," said Goten sincerely, sniffing and harshly wiping at his eyes in an attempt to halt his own tears.

Father and son earnestly embraced then; Piccolo and Trunks watching them with different feelings. Piccolo was relieved that one of his sons wasn't too hard on Goku. Trunks was precocious for his age and began wondering of other things. _Maybe_...

After pulling away and wiping their tears away on a sleeve, both Sons pulled away from one another; their eyes conveying their love and gratitude for each other far better than words.

"Well, its definitely time for bed you two," urged Goku, beginning to walk back to the house. Goten followed after and Trunks followed him. Piccolo went back inside last; keeping a keen vigilance for them all.

* * *

><p>It took a while, but with all the excitement of the day, the persistent hand of slumber began to overtake Goten; his eyelids feeling as if they each were weighted by two-ton weights. But before he could slip fully into sleep, he felt a sudden weight upon his chest. Intense fear immediately gripped his person. It couldn't be the...<p>

"Goten..." whispered Trunks atop him. _Whew! _"Don't scare me like that Trunks! I thought you were the-," "Those don't exist silly. But that's not important right now..." "How do you know? And you were just as scared as me back there!" exclaimed Goten indignantly. "Shhh... Just listen, will you?" "Trunks, I'm tired and want to get enough sleep so we can-," Trunks cut off Goten's sentence by bending down and pressing his lips to his. Goten's eyes widened in astonishment, but Trunks had already closed his.

After a moment, Trunks pulled away and slowly opened his eyes. Goten's expression was not at all encouraging. "I'm sorry," said Trunks, quickly moving back to his own sleeping bag. The thick silence began to get to him, so Trunks spoke up once more. "Please don't hate me Goten... After seeing your father and Piccolo, I had to..." Trunks voice faltered as sorrow began to pervade it. Goten sat up quickly; wrapping Trunks in his arms. "I could never hate you. You're my bestest friend ever Trunks!" Trunks decided not to correct his grammar and instead popped the question. "Then, would you be my mate?" "What's that?" "It's what your dad and Piccolo are, and my mom and dad are to each other." Goten thought for a minute. There was surely a difference between Trunks' parents and his father and Piccolo. What did Trunks really want from him?

"I already like you a lot Trunks. What would we haveta to different?" "Nothing now, but when were older-," "You want to do kissy-kissy things, huh?" "We don't have to now, but I'll probably want to when we're older, and you are the one I want to be with," confessed Trunks sincerely, his stunning blue eyes peering hopefully into Goten's mystical black ones. Goten looked away then at the intensity. "Trunks, I have never wanted to do kissy things... You're always ahead of me in everything; even if only a lil' bit. W-would you really wait 'til I'm ready too?" "Sure. I just want us to make it official." "How da we do that?" "Just say 'yes' to being my mate." "Yes Trunks, I'll be your mate," answered Goten with an all too genuinely innocent grin.

Trunks grinned from ear to ear; joy permeating every pore. There was just _one_ more thing, and he knew he had to do it before he lost the nerve. "Hey! Ow, Trunks, uhn..." Trunks pulled away from the wound he'd made with his eyeteeth; gently licking it. "Trunks?" whispered Goten clearly confused. "It's okay Goten. That was just to seal our oath to each other. Return the bite on me and we will be true mates. There will be no more until we're both ready, I promise," answered Trunks earnestly. "Oh, okay," said Goten tentatively, moving slowly to bite and lick Trunks' left pec too. "Can we go to sleep now?" "Yep," chirped Trunks, burrowing back into his sleeping bag; feeling warm, full and relieved, sleep finding him easily.

Goten, however, didn't feel so eased. So many things seemed to be happening so fast and he didn't seem to have control over any of them. He had recently lost his mother after barely regaining his father, Nii-chan seemed to have less and less time for him, and his best friend seemed to want things he didn't yet understand. If having to stay strong through all of that and more was what being an adult was all about, he didn't _ever_ want to grow up.

Tossing and turning a few more times before getting comfortable, Goten eventually succumbed to slumber. Little did he know his last conscious thoughts and all that had just occurred between him and Trunks was heard and taken to heart by one listening _uninvited_.

* * *

><p>"Son, I know something big happened earlier today, so stop blocking my telepathy. You know I only want to help you," urged Piccolo strongly. "I-I can't Pic. It hurts too much. I <em>never<em> would have believed..." "Son Goku, let me in. I am not going to allow you to keep making yourself sick like this," declared Piccolo, forcefully bringing Goku's forehead to touch his own. For once, Goku was tired of fighting; his mental block falling along with the dam keeping hold of his tears. After much was shared between them telepathically, Piccolo pulled away with a stern expression.

"You see? Gohan hates me. I know I don't always have the right answer, but never even from an enemy have I..." Goku's voice broke before he could finish.

"You've done your best Son; no one can deny that. From what I've gathered, that immense ire you felt from Gohan is the result of an amalgamation of things. So much has been placed on his shoulders so young. He has endured loss after loss; all the while struggling with the contrasts of his saiyajin urges, what others want and expect of him and the individual he truly desires to be. Finding out about us the way he did was just the straw to break the camel's back. All the negative energies which hadn't been properly processed built up within him until he reached a breaking point. And even so, he still stopped himself from killing you at the last moment. Gohan _does not hate_ you Goku. He has just been going through his own difficult transitions while still striving to grow into the man he desires to be. So, please stop this senseless self torment," urged Piccolo earnestly as he peered intensely into Goku's eyes, his elegant fingers gingerly wiping away his tears.

Goku peered back; realizing then how much stronger Chi-Chi had been than he. He wouldn't have made it without Piccolo there. He sincerely hoped that she was happy in Other World; that she would meet someone there who would be much better to her than he ever could be.

Moving slowly, sensually, Goku locked his lips with Piccolo; their kiss flavored with his tears, making it bittersweat. Though he would never admit it aloud, Piccolo relished the taste of Goku's lips and tongue as they mingled with his own; thoroughly aching for more with each sultry touch. Less than a year earlier, such an idea would have seemed utterly preposterous. But at that moment, nothing could be more sublime than having him wrapped in his fervent embrace...

Piccolo was awakened from his reverie as Goku pulled away, lay his head on his chest and wrapped himself in one of his long powerful arms; though he could still feel Goku's weariness and angst keeping him awake under the surface. He knew Goku needed to rest so began carefully running his deft fingers through Goku's thick wild mane. A new sound reached Piccolo's ears in no time. Was Goku really... Yes, he was. Who would have thought that saiyajin could purr. It was one sound he knew he would come to cherish.

Though he had wanted to say more to Goku, Piccolo was relieved that slumber had finally taken him. After casting his awareness in and around the Son residence once more to ensure the safety of its inhabitants and finding nothing out of the ordinary, Piccolo pulled the covers over he and Goku and closed his own eyes. He believed things would be better in time. For in time, nothing lasts forever; bad or otherwise.

**TBC...**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** **libbyluvs, **thank you for the lovely review. I am so glad I could bring you some joy; hopefully I'll be able to continue doing so. **Kami2015, **thank you so much for your kind, honest and elaborate review. It seems you are understanding things about each character spot-on. I have tried and will continue to try and stay true to the original characters while hopefully expanding their horizons some. I agree, it is somewhat difficult to see Piccolo in a domestic role, but it is also plausible and warranted. There have been quite a few instances where Piccolo trained/looked after youths (Gohan, Trunks and Goten) throughout the series. Between he and Goku, Piccolo no doubt has greater wisdom and patience than Goku. So I see Piccolo as being the more likely of the two to broaden his horizons and be willing to accept certain things he might not normally be accustomed to. It's a compliment really, for minds that are too rigid don't get very far and often limit the growth and possibilities of others. Also, while he is surely still Piccolo after Namekseijin fusion, Piccolo ultimately ends up absorbing and therefore becoming an amalgamation of 3 distinct souls: Piccolo-both the son and reincarnation of Piccolo Dai Maou (the evil half expelled from Kami/Nameless Namekseijin centuries ago), first fusee Nail, and Kami-the good half of the Nameless Namekseijin. Piccolo is a complex being and character; not to mention a hermaphrodite, so I believe he deserves a lot more personality and credit than he usually receives. I hope as my story continues I am able to do him some justice. Thanks so much again **Kami2015**. I am glad my story has merit even without the yaoi elements, and do look forward to your reviews. Thank you again to all have kept interest. Have a Happy Valentine's day and enjoy!

Chapter 3

_Rude Awakenings_

Piccolo awoke later than usual with an acute pain throbbing in his lower abdomen. He could feel that Goku was already up and out enjoying nature; fishing and gathering wild fruits and vegetables with Goten. It did bring a slight smile to his face. Though, he swiftly faltered as the sharp pain below became immense. Gazing down at himself, if it could have, his face would have went stark white then. His belly was protruding extensively as if... _No, no, no_... He knew and could feel his cycles quite well. _It shouldn't have been possible._

There was no more time to think as Piccolo's body began forcing him to deposit the fertilized egg in a very uncomfortable way. Piccolo bit his lip and held onto the edges of the blankets as the new encased life began to squeeze out of him in a way that hadn't happened for Namekseijin in centuries. A single tear did find its way past his eye despite his mental protest as the last bit of the egg finished stretching his nether regions farther than they had ever been before. For even with his natural abilities, it was still quite painful and fatiguing.

It took a few moments to catch his breath. But once he had, Piccolo sat up carefully and peered solidly at the green and white, purple goo-covered egg. He had severe and mixed feelings about it. He hadn't even been sure he and Goku could successfully produce offspring; let alone know if that was what he really wanted. It was just too soon and too strange. And what if something turned out to be wrong with it because it was a hybrid? His senses were off then by a long shot; much to his dismay. He just did not at all like how his body had suddenly turned against him. And...

Right on cue, Goku phased directly into their bedroom; both he and Goten with arms full of fresh food. He had sensed Piccolo's distress and gotten worried. Both Goku's and Goten's eyes became wide as they looked from Piccolo to the egg.

"Goten, go take this stuff into the kitchen, alright?" urged Goku lightly as if in a daze.

Goten grabbed up their catch and hurried out and to the kitchen without question.

Goku's eyes never left the egg. And Piccolo felt himself cringe as Goku's lips curved up into a full-on Son-smile. Piccolo hadn't wanted _it_; hadn't been trying for _it_. But Goku couldn't look happier; until he heard and felt Piccolo's thoughts and feelings.

"Y-you don't want 'im, Pic?" Goku's voice faltered, his face incredulous. "He's part of both of us," Goku continued in a whisper.

Piccolo bit his lip until it drew blood. How could he make Goku understand?

"I didn't mean for it happen Son. My body goes through its own cycles like any sexually producing being. This happened beyond my usual cycles, with no warning... I'm not ready. I did not even believe it was possible in the first place. And..."

"And what? It's okay to be with me but not have children with me?! You know, neither Gohan nor Goten were planned, but I've always loved them dearly."

"Son, you know that's not what I'm saying. Look... Gohan and Goten can get along in human society because they appear human. We have no idea how this child will turn out... When I was young, had I not been powerful, wicked and cruel, people would have been so to me because of how I appear. Just look how _too many_ of them still treat each other for having different levels of natural and healthy pigmentation to their skin, the shape and size of their eyes, nose and lips, the textures of their hair and the like; _such trivial things_. They _are_ one people and yet constantly deny it and waste so much time and energy going against, monopolizing and ultimately destroying each other. Their ignorance, greed and cowardice knows no bounds, and too many of them are too eager to hate and destroy for no good reason! . . . I would easily love any of your children, my children, _our children._ I am just not ready. And my body is not communicating to me properly. This has _never_ happened before. I don't... I don't like it at all," finally finished Piccolo, folding his arms and putting on his stoic facade in his own form of pouting.

Goku had to smile then. Though Piccolo had brought up some veracious and valid points about humans, he knew there was nothing they couldn't handle together. Piccolo was just scared, and in his own pride didn't want to admit it. That was natural for first time parents. And Goku was just too enthused that they _could _procreate together at all to stay mad. Wrapping Piccolo in his arms, Goku embraced him warmly; poring forth his love and appreciation to him without words. Everything would be okay. They were in it_ together_.

Piccolo allowed the intimacy for a nice moment before forcefully pulling away. Goku had to smile as Piccolo continued to grimace.

"Do you want me to carry you to shower?" asked Goku playfully.

"No! I am completely capable of handling myself. And if you start treating me differently, I'll give you a beating you won't soon forget!" answered Piccolo indignantly, beginning to levitate towards _his_ chosen destination.

Goku just smirked as he watched Piccolo very awkwardly float slowly away with a sheet around his waist. He did listen intently when Piccolo paused to speak once more.

"You could...clean up our child and the bed though. I am..._exhausted_," admitted Piccolo softly before leaving the room to shower.

He had never and would never like having to admit weakness of any kind, but he did understand that any real relationship was give and take by both parties. It was up to them to make sure it was in and at the right places and times.

"No problem Pic," chirped Goku happily. To have more children was a joy he hadn't even really hoped for. And from Piccolo, the child was sure to be someone amazing indeed.

After cleaning up the egg and fixing the bed with clean linen, Goku held the egg on his lap and gently wrapped it in a small yellow blanket. He couldn't wait for it to hatch! Goten tentatively peeked his little head around the corner then; curiosity getting the best of him.

"Come on in Goten," whispered Goku.

Goten stepped in quietly and moved over to his father. He looked to the egg and then to his father with large questioning eyes.

"This is your baby brother or sister or maybe both like Piccolo. I can't tell which yet, but I'm sure this child is gonna be somethin' special," said Goku, enthusiasm poring off him. "

Goten looked to him and then to the egg again and smiled before opening his arms.

"You wanna hold 'im?"

"Uh-huh, pleeease?"

"Here, be very careful Goten."

Goten nodded his head and carefully took hold of the egg which took both of his still small arms to do so. A full-on smile began to pervade his face then. For the first time _he_ was a big brother. It made him feel good and warm inside. He knew he would do all in his power to protect and teach his younger sibling, and he would always have time for him/her and always love him/her and make sure she/he always felt wanted.

When Piccolo finally came back into the room fully dressed, he melted despite his dismay. Gohan was still on the journey to better and balance himself with Dende. And in front of his eyes was the rest of _his family._ All being said, they were doing pretty well. At that moment he found himself lucky, blessed to be part of something so sublime. Gingerly wrapping his long arms around the three of them, he did something outside his normal behavior and embraced them all warmly; his pride be damned. Perhaps it wasn't such a bad thing after all.

* * *

><p>Gohan peered around observantly in vast reaches of his mind, but all he continued to see was an expansive sea of darkness. It seemed as if he had been searching for years in an eerie desert of nothingness. Where was it, the part of himself that always pushed him to lose control? Where was his...<p>

Gohan gasped as his mental body was suddenly assaulted by a deadly giant fist; forcing his body down into the hardened and unseen ground below. He ducked and dodged the best he could from a vicious foe he could neither see nor sense, but the giant fist succeeded in grasping him tightly; squeezing him cruelly until he could no longer even scream. Just as he thought he might die from the immense pressure, he heard a strange voice; unsure if it wasn't familiar.

"You are a fool and a wretch. Just look how much you waste fighting me! You're so pitiful, it pains me to look at you!" roared a booming monstrous voice.

Gohan forced himself to open his blood and dirt-incrusted eyes; finally able to see the Oozaru that held and spoke to him. It was a magnificent beast to behold! Majestic ebony fur and tail, immaculately carved muscles, mighty stature, power and fierce long fangs; Gohan was truly astounded. Everything about it screamed power, wonder. He had never gotten that close of a look at... Was that really...

"I AM YOU! This has been the whole problem; you bloody fool! You continue to struggle and deny me; only truly succeeding in denying yourself. Even now, you delved inside here in attempt to conquer me. Separation is the greatest illusion! You anger me with your foolishness!" roared the mighty beast.

"B-but you are my evil, my darkness. I must-,"

In deep ire, the Oozaru slammed down the fist holding Gohan hard before bringing him up near its face once more.

"You're wrong! You're not listening, you bloody fool! There is neither light nor dark here; _only you_. _You_ dictate whether or not you create or destroy in _any_ world. If you wish for freedom, be free."

"But you are constantly against me!" growled Gohan indignantly. "I always have to struggle just to hang on! You always make things more difficult for me! You won't let me be free!" he continued, tears beginning to stream down his disheveled face as if he were a wearied child.

It was only then that he took a solid look not only at the Oozaru but into its eyes, into it. He gasped as he witnessed himself in its eyes; tears falling just as profusely from it as he. It was then that its words began to truly sink in.

"I have made things more difficult than they ever needed to be; denying my saiyajin and other sides—myself—in order to appeal to others. . . _I am so sorry_," whispered Gohan finally.

Gently prying open the Oozaru's fist, Gohan climbed out and up to its face; beginning to hug and pet its long muzzle.

"I won't ask for forgiveness for all the time we have lost by being so disconnected. But please know, I will not allow myself to be a coward ever again, nor will I deny your existence," promised Gohan earnestly.

A warm and encompassing light began pervading and saturating the both of them then. For once, Gohan no longer felt at odds with himself.

* * *

><p>Gohan's body appeared calm on the surface as it remained still and in the same position it had been in for weeks. While the room Timeless did allow them to do so without having to worry about eating or resting, Dende was getting a bit worried. Gohan hadn't so much as gesture to him in all that time. While he did not wish to interrupt whatever breakthroughs Gohan might be making, perhaps he should...<p>

Dende's thoughts were rudely disrupted by the Gohan's sudden rush of wild, encompassing and plentiful golden energy. Dende watched in silent awe as Gohan's body stood and began to levitate as magnificent waves of brilliant power surged throughout it; his hair becoming rigid and lengthening to his middle back, his eyes being outlined in sharpening black, his irises taking on an intense mystical emerald hue as his eyes opened, and majestic sheen black fur covered almost each and every immaculately toned and defined muscle, along with the growth of a new tail. He was completely in awe as Gohan's sentou ryoku leveled to almost undetectable, yet all that power was clearly available to Gohan at will.

Dende hadn't words for it. Gohan was so incredible, so...

"You're not too bad yourself," playfully quipped Gohan, a genuine smile painting his face.

He had finally done it! He had made peace with himself and therefore gained the balance and control he had so sought and needed. There would always be a natural dichotomy within—as was true of all living beings—but never again would he unknowingly make himself prisoner within himself. Powerful urges or not, it would be him as a whole to make the choice to take his energy in whatever direction he deemed worthy.

Dende blushed deep violet when Gohan suddenly scooped him up, enveloped him with his mighty arms and began kissing him deeply. The intense transformation had destroyed Gohan's clothes, so Dende felt a bit awkward. But the more Gohan kissed him, the more Dende tentatively began to participate. He was earnestly trying to get the hang of physical intimacy—osculating anyway. He wasn't quite ready for more, so gently pushed Gohan and moved away when his hands began to wander.

"Dende? . . . I'm sorry. I'm just so happy and... _I do want you_," confessed Gohan fervently, piercing Dende so strongly with his eyes, he had to look away.

Dende took a few deep breaths before trying to speak again.

"I am happy for you Gohan. It seems you have reached an ultimate realization. Though I am sure you can still train to become as powerful as you wish, while still in your natural physical body; I doubt your body will need to go past this transformation. It is a balance of all of you—human, saiyajin/oozaru—allowing you immense power and capabilities without the exhaustive and bulky oozaru size or easily exhaustive usual Super Saiyajin transformation. It feels well beyond Super Saiyajin 3, yet merely placing another number on it wouldn't do it justice. Hmm... I think Ultimate Saiyajin would do. 'Super' seems exhaustive and tacky. You have always been more than words could convey, anyway. And since you have learned a great deal about yourself, I doubt very much that you will have to worry about losing control again. . . However, you have not even taken me on a date, Gohan. I understand you have needs but-,"

"Say no more. Is there anywhere you wish to go, anywhere at all? I have the power now to traverse the universe at will; regardless of distance."

Dende blushed again as he gazed at Gohan; looking away once more before speaking.

"I think you should get should get dressed before even thinking about going anywhere. May I?"

"Sure, dress me as you see fit," Gohan answered with a smile.

Dende took another breath, turned around and opened his hands; using his ability to dress Gohan in deep emerald gi pants tied with a vibrant violet obi and earthly brown Namekseijin moccasins. With all that magnificent fur, he didn't think Gohan would need a top.

Gohan peered down at himself on the mystically reflective surface of the room's floor and grinned. He truly liked what he saw.

Scooping Dende up in his arms, Gohan began thanking Dende with a flurry of light kisses before letting him down again.

"But seriously Dende, where would you like to go? We are in this together. You should get to chose just as much as I. Please, don't feel obligated to do things or go places just to suit me. I long so much for you to be happy too," said Gohan sincerely.

Dende thought for a moment before answering; a brilliant almost childlike smile pleasantly pervading his still quite youthful face, making Gohan almost melt.

"Can... Can we go to New Nameksei? We're all still brothers there, so the ceremony hasn't been performed in quite a long time. But, I would be honored if you would be my Tepipakoi, Gohan," sincerely confessed and asked Dende, a stray tear trailing his face at the immense emotion he felt in its meaning it.

"Tepipakoi? That's Namekkugou for life-mate, isn't it? Of course I would! You know I-,"

"The ceremony... It is a lot more serious than mere earthling marriage. Like a Namekseijin fusion, it cannot be undone. You must be entirely certain. For there will be severe consequences to the both of us should our love for one another falter," informed Dende seriously.

"I love you Dende; with my entire being. What more can I say or do? You are my heart. I cannot bear the thought of living without you with me," confessed Gohan, his own eyes shimmering under his immense emotion.

Dende wiped his eyes and smiled. Perhaps, they could make it through the Dai Chourou's arduous tests, and then be united forever with the Tepipakoi ceremony.

"Let me call out to Dai Chourou Moori. He will be the one to test and unite us in the Tepipakoi ceremony once all tests are passed. If things are well there and he isn't too busy, I'll set up things here with Mister Popo. I can't stay away from Earth too long, but I don't think it will be a problem," informed Dende, full of emotion.

Gohan pulled Dende to him and kissed him once more before they both began to walk out of the room Timeless together.

"Gohan, what about you and your father? Will you talk to him so he's not worried while we're gone?" inquired Dende tentatively.

While he didn't wish to ruin the moment, Dende knew he had to be honest. He really hoped Gohan and Goku would patch things up before they decided to do anything serious. Just as he hoped for Moori's blessing, he yearned for Goku's and Piccolo's blessing of their union as well.

While Gohan's face did falter slightly, he managed to smile once more. He did not wish to be angry anymore so chose not to be. His father was a good guy, and he could _never_ hate Piccolo. If they could make each other happy, he could be happy for them. They did both deserve to be.

"We'll tell them all together," answered Gohan with a smile.

Dende smiled too before grasping Gohan's hand with his own. Never before had he felt, so serenely warm, so delightfully _full_.

* * *

><p>Goten played happily in the large outside tub with his father after washing. He had even used his child wiles earlier; giving Piccolo his best puppy-dog eyes to get him to get in the bath with them. While he wouldn't participate in the festivities, Piccolo did eventually get undressed; slipping into the exquisitely soothing water on a side of the tub and sighing leisurely.<p>

When it felt like Goku and Goten were about to get too rowdy and go Super Saiyajin, Piccolo used his psychokinesis to pick the two of them up, turn them upside down and dunk them under a few times before letting them drop back into the tub.

Goku and Goten both hurried up for air; sputtering and coughing. They were about to give Piccolo a piece of what he had coming to him until they heard and witnessed something wonderful. Piccolo was actually laughing in genuine mirth; something no one had ever witnessed before. Goku had heard him laugh evilly before, but it was so different then. He almost seemed like another person, so Goku and Goten let him have it; joining in. The moment was truly sublime; one Goku knew he would hold in his heart forever.

* * *

><p>Trunks hurried about the kitchen; pep in his step and a smile on his face. He was finally getting the hang of it. It had been weeks since he had marked Goten as his mate, and he had been doing all in his power to learn more things for the both of them. For his mate, he would be able to...<p>

"Trunks! What in the blazes is going on with all this racket!" barked Vegeta, not at all pleased that his son was up making such a racket at that godforsaken hour.

As vast and luxurious as Capsule Corp was, the boy knew better. He knew how keen and strong both their senses were as saiyajin. Just what... Vegeta's demeanor changed after taking more than a mere glimpse at him. The boy looked as if he had been caught doing something less than laudable. _Hmm._

"What are you up to, Trunks?" inquired Vegeta in a disturbingly calm tone, a smirk curving up one side of his face, moving closer until he was just in front of him.

His nose and the sight of the kitchen had already told him that the boy had been trying to cook, so why did he scent fear in him? Learning to take care of oneself was nothing to be ashamed of. Wait... Something else was clearly off about his scent. And then that he thought of it, the boy had been making sure to avoid him for weeks, and he had allowed it, divesting his attention to training. Taking a deep inhalation, Vegeta's face turned deathly pale.

"Trunks, what have you done?" voiced Vegeta under his breath. Without thinking, he grasped Trunks harshly by the cuff of his shirt, dragged and tossed him outside before beginning to wale on him in a bitter rage.

"How could you do that boy?! How could you..._with Kakarotto's brat no less_?!" Vegeta's thoughtless and inimical barrage continued in mean fists and curt broken cursing as his sentou ryoku rose to his limit.

Trunks powered up as far as he could to counter, but without fusing with Goten, he still could not yet reach the Super Saiyajin 3 strong enough to overpower his father. His still small body began being overwhelmed by Vegeta's fierce and unrelenting hits. Tears began to fill his eyes; not at the physical assault but at the trust he had lost in his father. He had done everything he had taught him; marking his mate once he was sure of whom it was to keep them both 'safe'. Why was his father so incredibly angry? While he had waited to tell him, fearing that Vegeta might not be too pleased with how soon he'd done it, he never would have believed that he could be so cruel. Goten was powerful and wonderful and his scent and innocent loving nature drove Trunks nearly out of his mind. He was the perfect choice. He couldn't see himself with anyone else, ever. He knew their fathers only got along when they fought each other, but what did that have to do with him and Goten? Was his father really that asinine?! _Why?!_

Trunks found his resolve then; evading and delivering a few caustic blows of his own. _Goten was his mate; nothing could nor should change that._ And he would be damned if he needed his father's blessing then; not after all that.

"Goten is my mate. I don't care if you are too small-minded to understand or accept it... And I won't _ever _forgive you for this!" declared Trunks strongly.

Teleporting in and out of the space around his father, Trunks built up a powerful Kamehameha; waiting until the last possible moment to re-enter space and hitting his father in the face. Ha! His father had never learned shunkan idou, but being the precocious child he was, Trunks had picked up on it the more Goku and Gohan used it. The blast at full power had been enough to knock Vegeta out at point blank range, but it and all he had been forced to endure mentally and physically had taken its toll on Trunks. He knew he had to leave. His father would _never_ understand. He could still feel the saturated waves of negativity permeate in him even as he lie unconscious. Though he yearned immensely to go to Goten right then, he thought better of it. He needed to be alone for a while; a new caustic hole beginning to burn its way into his own being.

Taking one last hurt and disgusted look at his father, Trunks teleported to one of his secret places. Only when he was ready, would he allow his presence to be felt again.

Bulma ran outside too late; her mate unconscious in the dirt and a painful feeling in her chest as it began to tighten for her only child.

* * *

><p>Trunks took a deep breath before blowing his nose and wiping away the rest of his tears. He still couldn't believe how much hate and rage he had felt from his father. Not too long ago, Vegeta had been his coolest hero. He had even denied his Goten; claiming that his father was much greater than even Goku. He had been immensely proud that he was the son of the Great Saiyajin no Ouji. But all that happened with Buu and after and now this! He was...<p>

Tears quickly filled and spilled from Trunks' eyes once more; he hugging his legs closer to his body in a lonely corner of the cave he'd claimed. The storm of thunder, lightning and torrents of rain outside seemed like nothing compared to the hurricane of pain, hurt and confusion that continued to take place within him. No child wanted to hate their parents. But the more he cogitated, the greater the caliginous brew within him stirred. Why did it have to...

Trunks gasped and hacked harshly before peering around incredulously. Someone or something unseen had swiftly drawn him up and tossed him hard, deeper into the cavern and against its wall. A twinge of fear did overtake him then, as he could neither feel nor sense any other lifeform in there with him. What on Earth had...

"Ugh!" cried Trunks as his body was being forcibly shoved the up the moist wall of the cavern.

The side of his face and front of his torso were sullied; his arms being forcefully secured behind him by a vise-like grip. Trunks strove to fight back and remain strong, but a lot had already been taken out of him. And no matter how precocious, he was still a child. Once he felt harassing breath on the back of his neck, he did whimper in genuine terror.

"There is no need for you to suffer anymore. Let me take it all away..." whispered a seducing voice into his ear.

Trunks' consciousness screamed inside as he felt his body relax without his volition. Within a swift moment, he felt a deep and acute pain in his neck. As much as he wanted to, he could not even scream as he heard and felt the sickening sound of his lifeblood being gruesomely sucked away from him; the tormenting sound of his own weakness and possible demise.

He hadn't the energy left for more tears. But as his conscious began to falter—his vision becoming bleary and maddening with strangely dancing images—the last vestiges of his sanity did cry out to his best friend and beloved. If nothing else, he wanted Goten to know how much he loved him; that he was so very sorry for not being _strong enough..._

* * *

><p>Goten shot up in a cold sweat; his body soaked and tears beginning to flow profusely from his eyes. "Trunks?" he whispered thoroughly discombobulated.<p>

He had no idea what was wrong, he only knew it was _very_ and with Trunks. Goten continued to pant and grasp at his thick spikes of hair. The day had been one of his favorite until that moment. He had gone fishing and gathering with his father in the morning, he found out later that he had become a big brother, and even later his father had trained him one on one; not to mention Piccolo's wonderful cooking. It hadn't been the same as Kaasan's, but it had still been amazing. And he would surely never forget the wondrous sound of Piccolo's laughter when he had finally gotten him to bathe with them. . . It had all been so great, so why did something so bad have to happen to Trunks?! Why was there suddenly this horrible pain inside that he couldn't stomach, could not bear?

"Ugh!"

Goten barreled over as excruciating pain took over his still small body. He had wanted so much to go out there and find Trunks and make it all better somehow, but the overwhelming and immense agony forced his young consciousness to fade. With his last conscious thought, Goten's heart went out to his best friend and mate.

_I'm sorry Trunks... Please, somehow be okay..._

Piccolo and Goku rushed into Goten's bedroom; worry wracking their forms, if not evident in their faces. No words needing saying. They had both felt Goten's life force suddenly become acutely pained, weakening by the moment. Within an instant, Goku took the four of them to Kami's Lookout; Piccolo carrying their egg in the violet frontal carrier he had made and Goku cradling Goten in his arms. Goku knew he could not handle losing another close to him. _He just could not..._

**TBC...**


End file.
